Sean Donnelly

[vesalius_451 0]

Player

Player name: vesalius_541

Character number: 1

Faction: Atlantic Federation

 

General

 

Full name: Sean Micheal Donnelly

Nickname: The Irishman

Age: 18

Gender: Male

Race: Natural

Occupation: Pilot

Birthplace: Dublin, Ireland, Atlantic Federation

Citizenship: Atlantic Federation

Personality: Sean, to most people, appears to be the stereotypical image of the Irish: muscular, rough, and ready to fight. This is very true and Sean is very proud of it. Although, he doesn't like any sort of alcoholic beverage. Sean is very short tempered, especially when it comes to his Irish back round and proves it by avidly boasting to anyone that will listen that he's 100 percent pure Irish.

 

Despite this rather rough and ready appearance, Sean also has other more peaceful traits. He likes to read long novels, when his isn't doing anything else, and also likes to listen to music, though he plays it very loud.

Appearance

 

Height: 5'11''

Weight: 186 lbs

Hair Colour and Style: Sean has longer black hair which he always gels and puts into a small mohawk.

Eye Colour: Dark Blue

Identifying Marks: Sean is covered in my tattoos that cover most of his upper body. The largest one shows a picture of the OMNI Enforcer logo and the words "In God We Trust" written underneath.

Skin Tone: Well tanned.

Build: Very muscular

Clothing: Sean is usually seen in and Earth Forces uniform, but when he isn't wearing that, he just throws on a white t shirt and some blue jeans.

Handiness: Right-handed

 

Background

 

Mother: Artis Donnelly

Father: Alaster Donnelly

Siblings: None

Wife/Girlfriend: Rin Akita (A one way sort of thing)

 

Personal History: Sean Micheal Donnelly was born on the 31st of October, C.E. 67. His parents, Alaster and Artis were normal, run of the mill parents who worked hard for a living. Alaster was an officer in the Atlantic federation and Artis was a nurse at a hospital in Dublin. Alaster was stationed in the Dublin area, so he could visit Sean and Artis several times a week. The first couple of years of Sean's life were pretty normal. But that all changed when the war started.When war broke out between Earth and the PLANTs in C.E. 70, Alaster was sent to Ptolemaeus Lunar Base. Sean's mother had to quit her job as a nurse in order to stay home and take care of him. Since Sean was only three at the time, he couldn't understand why his father had to leave him and his mother.

 

As the war went on, Sean repeatedly tried to sneak and find his father, but was stopped every time. As the war started to wind down, Sean started to under stand why his father though that it was necessary to leave him behind and got fight. When Alaster returned at wars end, he seemed different, and Sean noticed. He would often ask his father what the matter was, but his father would always grunts and leave the room. After the war, Sean was enrolled in preschool, and got along well with the other people there. By C.E. 73, Sean was showing a great interest in all things mechanical. He had even started to construct simple little machines out of things that were left lying around the house. A month before he "Break The World" incident, Alaster talked Artis into enrolling Sean in a school that was supported by Blue Cosmos.

 

When the second war started, Sean was already being "re educated" by Blue Cosmos. His daily training consisted entirely of him watching propaganda films telling him how coordinators "were space monsters that must be killed in order to preserve the blue and pure world". Sean was too young to fully under stand the effect that these films were having on him. Eventually, he even began to say and repeat what was said in the films to other young children, since he didn't know any better. As the new war went on, Sean gradually began to understand what the messages were saying, and he began to agree. When the war ended, and Logos was all but destroyed, the school was shut down and all the students were sent to other schools.

 

In the early years after the war, Sean still believed in what Blue Cosmos has taught him and actively discriminated against coordinators. At age ten, he along with another group of kids cornered and badly beat a young coordinator. The coordinator was left with several broken ribs and various other fractures as well as other, less severe injuries. The other kids sold Sean out and left him to take all the blame for what had happened. Sean was given two years of house arrest and another two years probation. The two years passed very slowly and aloud Sean time to pick up better habits, like reading and music. His father, after having survived two bloody wars, barely said anything at all, and treated Sean and his mother terribly, beating them often. If Sean got in the way when Alaster was having a fight with Artis, he would just grab him and beat him instead. As the time passed, Sean began to hate his father.

 

When Sean turned fourteen, he left the house and started out on his own. After only a month, he was already in trouble with the police, relating to a large fight he had been in. The fight landed two guys in hospital, and got Sean into some serious trouble. The police held him for little while, not willing to press charge on his first offense, and let him go. After that, he joined a small Irish gang that run out of the north part of Dublin, getting in fights, small time robberies and other such things. At age fifteen, Sean was severing two years in a juvenile detention center for aggravated assault. When he was finally let out, anyone who new Sean before he was arrested wouldn't recognize him. He was covered in tattoos, had a mohawk instead of his normal messy hair, and had bulked up a lot.

 

After being released from juvenile detention, Sean applied for the Earth Forces, or more specifically, the Atlantic Federation. He was accepted soon after and began the training right away. He was part of class 3212. The instructor had an odd way of doing this training. He pared all the people in his class up, in order to teach them about working as a team. Sean got pared with a young girl (17ish) named Rin Akita. As the courses progressed, the two seemed to never be far apart. Although Sean actively denied it, people viewed them to be going out. Rin, however, was all for this and stuck even closer to him than ever before. The two were complete opposites of each other in relation to behavior and attitude, especially towards coordinators. Rin was care free and kind to everyone while Sean blew everybody off and hated coordinators.

 

After he graduated, Sean transfered to the Pacific, the same place as Rin. They have been stationed there ever since.

Edited October 3, 2007 by Guest

[liubei013 0]

Not bad, not bad at all.

 

I would suggest going through your profile carefully as there are a few minor errors here and there.

(e.g. Personality section: 'background') 

 

While I do a general look at grammatical aspects, I read more into the content aspects of profiles.  (usually)

 

The only thing that bothered me was how his parents wanted Sean to go to a Logos-supported school.  The problem with this is that technically Logos was a 'secret' conglomeration of businessmen that manipulated both the politicians and the military to further conflict and thus, to further profits from war industries that they own.  However, your history would be more 'correct' to say that it was a Blue Cosmos supported school considering the anti-Coordinator doctrine Sean 'learned' there and that Blue Cosmos was the public face of Logos, especially in relation to the Atlantic Federation.

 

You could put some more detail into Sean's father as to his condition after the war among other things.

 

But from the looks of it, you got a great profile here with no need for any major overhaul.  (But it's best to get a second opinion or two...since I tend to miss some things. )

[Kaizer 0]

As always, Liu beat me to the punch .  Not much I can see to edit, save to check for spelling errors, and to say that the school was Blue Cosmos supported, rather than by Logos.  With those changes made, I would have no problem with accepting you into the EA (though we'll have to see just how his anti-coordinator attitude works out with some of the Coordinator members of the EA, myself included )

[vesalius_451 0]

There, I changed all the Logos to Blue Cosmos. How is it now?

[liubei013 0]

You still did not fix the numerous minor spelling errors that Kaizer and I pointed out.  Try to use a Spell Checker to run through the profile and proof-read it yourself.  After that, it should be ready for approval.

 

(Luckily, Kaizer's also the Faction Leader for the EA/AF. )

[vesalius_451 0]

Ya, sorry about that. I got a little ahead of myself. Anyway, I fixed all the ones that were spelled wrong ( a few still have a read underline, but that's the way they're supposed to be spelled). If it still needs any work, let me know.

[Kaizer 0]

There's not too many errors left in it spelling wise, though you should try not to rely on computer spell checks all that much (they don't notice when you replace one word with another; such as many with 'my', or an with 'and').  Like I said though, its not a large number of errors, and as long as you keep a look out for them in the future, then there shouldn't be any problems.

 

Crewman Recruit Sean Micheal Donnelly accepted, welcome to the EA 

[vesalius_451 0]

Thanks