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Hikaru Hatake

zgmf x20a infinite

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Full name: Hikaru Hatake

Nickname: Hiki

Age: 18

Gender: Male

Race: Coordinator

Occupation: Mobile Suit Pilot (training)

Birthplace: Orb, City of Kusanagi

Citizenship: Plant

Personality: Kind and forgiving but if upset his attitude becomes negative and self-centred




Height: 5.7 ft

Weight: 225 lbs

Hair Colour and Style: Short brown messy hair

Eye Colour: Crystal blue

Identifying Marks: A scar on his right arm (around the shoulder)

Skin Tone: Tan light brown

Build: Muscular

Clothing: A white T-shirt and with a black vest on top,long black cargo pants with a skull on the right side

Handiness: Right-Handed




Mother: -Descesed

Father: -Desecesed

Siblings: None

Wife/Girlfriend: Hikaru has a girlfriend named Sakura Misaki who is currently living in Plant with Hikaru and is studying drama.


Personal History: When Hikaru was young he lived happily in Orb. One day they finally arrived in Onogoro. The family decided

to have a holiday there since they had been planning it for a couple months now. Hikaru insisted that their uncle Akira join them.

Akira Hatake was a successful business man in Orb and beloved by his nephew Hikaru. It seemed the happiest time in Hikaru's life but

what he didn't know is that this would be the day that tormented his life forever.

It was 16 October 71 CE It was a bright and shiny day, perfect for a nice holiday. time passed quickly since it was

3pm now and the family had just finished there picnic in the park they were planning to go site seeing when suddenly they heard a loud BOOM!!

and many others followed after it. Then the emergency siren went off, the family hurried to the nearest shelter as they ran they heard screams

and continues booms and bangs. Unlucky for them they were quite far from the closest shelter. The family went cut through the forest because

it was a shortcut to the closest shelter. But as they saw the shelter in sight BOOM! a missile suddenly blew up and destroyed the shelter.

In the aftermath young Hikura could only see was burnt bodies stained in blood everywhere inculding his parents bodies. Little Hikaru was

devastated it seemed tears wouldn't stop flowing from his eyes, all he felt was pain all around his body especially from his heart. it felt like

he died luckily his uncle Akira was still alive and carried him as far as he could with his broken arm and limb but with a loss of too much blood

his uncle fell. Hikaru saw his sight blacking, he was dying. They were very lucky as a Orb troop car spotted them and bran them to the main shelter

and wounds were treated on to stop further blood loss. Then they were driven to the hospital in the City of Kusanagi to be operated on and recover.

As Hikaru woke up he found himself in a bed in the hospital next to his uncle he wondered what happen then as fast as lighting he remembered his parents

death. Tears began to flow from his eyes once again but they were not tears of sadness but of hatred of the Atlantic Federation and the Earth Alliance.

When they got out of the hospital a few weeks later they hadn't recovered completely since there were many attacks in Orb lately so they were released from

the hospital. His Uncle Akira decided to fly to the Plants since they were cordinators. Over 10 years they lived happily in the Plants.

During the first 4 years Hikaru went to school while his uncle continued his work in the marketing area. During the first years of school Hikaru was

a outsider as he choose to be that way he would always give everyone the cold shoulder he has no friends but he pefered  it that way he was smart

in all topic especially maths. when Hikura was 11 he meet a girl named Sakura Misaki who just started at his school.

Sakura was a very beautiful girl with long brown hair nicely shaped face and a good body with a very bright smile that would cheer anyone up. Somehow Sakura

got passed the shell in Hikaru's heart and got into the soft part. Over the years they became the best of friends they shared secrets always did homework

together had sleepovers weekly. When they were 15 there were rumours that they liked each other but as naive they both were they denied it. The next year they

confessed there feelings for each other. And on that day Hikaru attitude changed from being cold to everyone to being nice and caring to everyone and not a outcast.

Hikaru decided to move out and rent a flat with Sakura when he was 17.  Sakura decided to study drama as she was a great actor. As for Hikaru he decided on

computer engineering. But as soon as he could he left computer engineering to become his dream, a mobile suit pilot to avenge his parents and fight the

Earth Alliance. Sakura told him that vengeance is not good and he might die if he became a pilot Sakura was very worried about him. But Hikaru didn't give in

and is now training to be a mobile suit pilot. He still keeps in contact with Sakura and his uncle Akira through but he works hard to become a mobile suit pilot.



Hope that's good enough took me couple hours tell me if anything is wrong. And i know i kinda made it like a story lol.


Yours truly: ZGMF X20A Infinite

Edited by Guest
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Perhaps you could use the spell check. Note the punctuations and the caps. You tried to squeeze too much information in your character profile. Perhaps you could try to leave some of the character development and history to your actual RPing in the format of a flashback of sorts. Paragraphing would be nice. A good first attempt at drafting your character profile. 

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Firstly, this isn't an official statement or anything but the name "Hikaru" sounds kinda like a chick's name to me


You have to expand vastly on his personality, why does he become negative and self centered if he becomes upset? A bit hard to explain but you gotta flesh out the detail there a bit more.


Second, 5.7 feet and 225lbs? That's pretty heavy for his height, I'm about 5.7 feet in real life and I don't weigh 105 kilograms (thats converted from lbs), I only weigh about 50 kilograms.


Also you could run spell check, you spelt deceased wrong, twice. I don't see how you got the 2nd spelling of it to not match the first try. Some words are spelt like: bran instead of brought


Fix up some of your grammar, it should be 'loved by his nephew'


Instead of using the word 'BOOM!!' try using words like explosion.


If the shelter blew up just when they got in visual sight of it, how did his parents get burnt to a crisp if they were basically right next to him? I'm assuming that the missile's blast impact and ensuing fireball reached the family.


Other than your biography's grammar and spelling it seems pretty good.


Though you may want to make it a little easier to read rather than have a clump of text and random spaces between paragraphs.

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If you don't know how much lbs is in kilograms, just use kilograms. pounds isn't universal (at least not entirely).


-Hikaru is quite an all-right name for a male. Gundam Wing's Heero Yuy has Hikaru Midorikawa for his voice acting.


-To zgmf: Try paragraphing your personal history and backgrounds. That will make it easier to read. Check out the chinks in your biography as said by winders and Constantine and you'll be fine. Of course, don't hesitate to ask around for guidance if you still don't know what might be wrong.

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Nah, there are more males named Hikaru than females (one of the twins in Ouran for example).


I'm assuming that you have typed this entire thing in Notepad, judging by how the sentences seems to...space out in a weird manner.


...One thing is that the sentences are rather...how to say it...joined in a strange manner, just that it doesn't flow well. As the others have said, you will need some cleaning up in the history section.

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