Kyu Biura 0 Posted October 10, 2006 Share Posted October 10, 2006 (edited) Full name: Kyu U Biura Nickname: Kyu Age: 18 Gender: Male Race: Coordinator Occupation: Zaft pilot Birthplace: Aprillus One Citizenship: Plant Personality: Open and energetic though will sometimes go totally beserk in combat if provoked. IS a very optimistic kind of guy, usually looking on the bright side of things. Appearance Height: 162 cm Weight: 150 lbs Hair Colour and Style: Brown, Spiky Eye Colour: Blue Identifying Marks: None Skin Tone: Pale Build: Athletic Clothing: White T-shirt, with a blakc coat and blue jeans. Handiness: Right handed Background Mother: Mia Biura Father: Naji Biura Siblings: None Wife/Girlfriend: None Personal History: Kyu was born and raised in plant, with his mother, because his father had appaerently died in the 2nd bloody valentine war, so he doesn't remeber him much, though he still knows he died fighting the Earth Allaince, and always detested them for it. He was raised pretty normally, except that his mother was in the Zaft military, so she might go here or there for a while, for some reason or another. He had quite a few friends growing up, and always felt the urge to protect them when they were in trouble, like he had to defend them or else they might dissapear. For example, When he and his friends were in 1st grade, one of his friends had 'accidently' tripped someone in the hall. That person knew someone ahd tripped him on purpose, and would have pummeled Kyu's friend, until Kyu stepped in and said HE had tripped him. A black eye and several bruises later, his friend thanked Kyu, but Kyu just said it wasn't really a problem. He ended up getting a dream, where he could fight for the Zaft military, and protect his friends and fellow coordinators, for he was well aware of the racism between naturals and coordinators, and although he didn't believe in it himself, he knew that in order to protect his people, he would knew power only the military had. When he was about 14, he asked his Mother to teach him how to pilot a Mobile Suit, which, reluctantly, she ended up doing. In his idle time, Kyui would go off and get a little excersize, by doing a variety of things. He usually jogged at least once every day, for at least an hour. Sometimes he would even go down to the park and play some sport or another. If he wasn't playing sports though, he was studying at his home, for some test or another at school. He was very determined to get good grades in school, so that he might actually get into the military, when he grew up. He gradauted from school at 17, the result of startign school a little earlier than other kids, and intended to go to the military then, but had a slight change of plans. Instead of going to the military, he decided to use this year as a chance to to learn a few other things, so he could be better suited for the military. He became an engineer, seeing as that might help him the most, and practiced the profession for all his time off. He stopped a year later, still being a novice at it, seeing as one doesn't become a master engineer in a day, but he was moderatly skilled, enough to do minor repairs on things anyway. Content with his skill, and finally ready to join Zaft, Kyu immeadiently quit his job as an engineer, and then went off and joined Zaft, after applying first and all of course. Joining the military isn't just 'snap, snap, your in' after all. Edited January 5, 2007 by Guest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
winders 0 Posted October 25, 2006 Share Posted October 25, 2006 I doubt your character would be able to start learning how to pilot MS before the age of eight, as children are generally not permitted on Military grounds. There's nothing to link the time from when his father died to current age, if he was eight when his father died then fifteen years later he would be 23 years old, not eighteen. BTW: There's no war atm. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rad 0 Posted November 5, 2006 Share Posted November 5, 2006 Please repost your profile to follow the template provided here. Aside from that, your father can't have been killed in a battle with the EA four years ago, as there have been no open conflicts for the past decade. As well, your profile is a bit on the short side. You should also be able to edit your past posts now. That particular problem has been fixed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyu Biura 0 Posted November 7, 2006 Author Share Posted November 7, 2006 Thanks, getting right on fixing it, though will probably majorly change it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evo_Sieg 0 Posted November 7, 2006 Share Posted November 7, 2006 err, you better use the template, the citizenship is still missing. Better fix it soon, so we can start on the coliseum! hehe... Nah, take your time to make a good bio, as the Representative has told you. Hehe... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyu Biura 0 Posted November 7, 2006 Author Share Posted November 7, 2006 Ok, addded cictzenship, and extended bio. Do I need more than 3 paragraphs in my bio? If so I will try to add more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evo_Sieg 0 Posted November 7, 2006 Share Posted November 7, 2006 Your character profile still lacks the following: Height: Weight: Identifying Marks: Skin Tone: Siblings: Wife/Girlfriend: I suggest you use the template provided [url = http://www.adventdestiny.com/index.php/topic,17.0.html]HERE[/url], so you could get you bio finished. Also this line: though he still knows he died fighting the Earth Allaince, and always detested them for it. He was raised pretty normally, first this: though HE still knows HE died fighting the Earth Allaince, the second HE is wuite misleading, is it you or your father? better just put "His father" second: fighting the Earth Allaince, and always detested them for it. them is also tricky, better put "the Earth Alliance" just to keep it clear, and the spelling of Alliance is incorrect, hehe.. You could further deepen the bio by indicating how he grew up, how he lived through high schol and college, how he enjoys spending idle time, among other things. I think the boards Bio-picky admins would be able to give you better advise. Just try to write what comes into your mind, most likely creativity will flow from there. Just some advice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyu Biura 0 Posted November 7, 2006 Author Share Posted November 7, 2006 Ok, added a little more. Would have added more but I have to go now, will be back a little later today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rad 0 Posted November 7, 2006 Share Posted November 7, 2006 Please use the template. Copy the code from the link Sieg has provided into a word processor such as Notepad, then copy and paste your information from this profile into that file. We're trying to standardize the profiles as much as possible. Also, citizenship is the nation which recognizes you as one of it's own (think of it as the nation that issued your legal passport and driver's license). In this case, that would be PLANT. As well, your birthplace should be a specific PLANT (ex. Januarius 3, Februarius 10, etc.). I have a challenge for you that may help expand on your character's history: aside from his father's death during the war, what other significant event/s in his life convinced him that the best decision he could make in his life was to join the military? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyu Biura 0 Posted November 8, 2006 Author Share Posted November 8, 2006 What else do I need to improve to get it accepted? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rad 0 Posted November 8, 2006 Share Posted November 8, 2006 Your birthplace and citizenship are incorrect. Your citizenship should be PLANT, but your birthplace should be one of the PLANT colonies (ie. Januarius 4, Februaris 9, etc.) Then, proof-read your work for any spelling, grammar, punctuation, etc. errors. All you have to do after that is to wait for any other suggestions and for Valiant to come by and approve your profile. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyu Biura 0 Posted November 9, 2006 Author Share Posted November 9, 2006 Ok, done, now to wait for Valiant. 'Stands in corner and waits.' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rad 0 Posted November 9, 2006 Share Posted November 9, 2006 I can't believe I missed that, but although he can have dyed his hair silver, the rule here is that all characters must at least have an original, natural color. So, please state your character's original hair color. Also, check for spelling errors. The on-site spell-checker does a satisfactory job. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyu Biura 0 Posted November 9, 2006 Author Share Posted November 9, 2006 Ok done, oh and I clicked spell-check and didn't see any errors. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
winders 0 Posted November 9, 2006 Share Posted November 9, 2006 Could you put it in the proper template? http://www.adventdestiny.com/index.php/topic,17.0.html The coding is all the way at the bottom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyu Biura 0 Posted November 9, 2006 Author Share Posted November 9, 2006 Ok, done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valiant 96 Posted November 10, 2006 Share Posted November 10, 2006 Getting beaten up for being tripped is... so childish. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xover 0 Posted November 19, 2006 Share Posted November 19, 2006 A few spelling errors still sorry to highlight earlier... When using ZAFT, I'm not sure but maybe you're supposed to put all in capitals? Smae with any others. Unless one of the Mods or Admin comes in an says that I'm wrong (and I usually am ) he didn't believe in it himself, he knew that in order to protect his people, he would knew power only the military had The above was kinda confusing...did ya mean he needed to power of the military? Sorry, it's just a bit confusing and all... And you said that he didn't believe in himself even though he's open and energetic. Usually, those kinda people are fairly confident, no? If you want to keep it that way, I don't mind, it's just...yeah. I won't put anything else in, sorry for the uber post earlier ' It was stupid! I know... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
winders 0 Posted November 22, 2006 Share Posted November 22, 2006 Mate, that was 4 years before the current age of his character. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valiant 96 Posted November 22, 2006 Share Posted November 22, 2006 Mate, that was 4 years before the current age of his character. Were you referring to my statement? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
winders 0 Posted November 22, 2006 Share Posted November 22, 2006 Nope, I meant Xover's. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyu Biura 0 Posted December 15, 2006 Author Share Posted December 15, 2006 (edited) Sorry for being gone so long, I have been having a rough time at school at not getting to much time to myself lately. Anyhow, about Valiant's comment, well, I will clear this in bio, seeing as I wasn't very specific, that happened in about.......... 1st grade., cause back then they were children, so it was childish. Sorry about not making that clear in the bio, will clear that up. Edited December 23, 2006 by Guest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valiant 96 Posted December 30, 2006 Share Posted December 30, 2006 The history is still on the short side. Please work on it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyu Biura 0 Posted January 2, 2007 Author Share Posted January 2, 2007 Added. Addemd about 2 more paragraphs to the history, but will add more if needed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valiant 96 Posted January 4, 2007 Share Posted January 4, 2007 Well, you can say that you are in ZAFT. We have changed things a little here so it would help if you read our guides. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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